Help Me....Love me!

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He stops!
He steps back....and drops the flashlight.
He starts to cry and runs outside like he just saw a ghost.
I want to run after him to hug him,
To tell him that it is okay.

Yes, to console him.
Yes, the man who was about to kill me,
Yes, the man who hits me for loving him.
Yes, him that I have lost everything for.
Yes, I know..I am stupid.

Why do I stay you ask,
Why am I this stupid you wonder.
I will tell you...
I will show you...
I will explain.

Because I am weak...he had made me.
He owns my mind..heart and sadly decisions.
He has made me feel like if I leave...he will die or kill me.
And I feel like I have to stay to help him be human again,
Should I? NO!

But unless you are in my shoes..You will never know.
You will never understand. And I know that.
So please help me....
Not by judging me but by helping me love myself again.
Not by disowning me but by embracing me.

Help me help myself first.
Help my heart heal,
Help my mind recover.
Help my soul come back.
Help me talk about this!

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